i have a feeling that its getting kind of silly to put lyrics of sum of my favourite songs on this blog of mine. people may get the wrong idea sometimes.... *sigh* my o level prelims are coming soon and i have not even revised yet. after the upcoming september school holidays, the prelim examination will start. my religious class exams will also take place during the same time. and i have not started studying again.... *sigh* tomorrows teachers' day and i would not be going back to my primary school after the celebrations in school because i will be having biology class one hour after that. its been one year since i went back last teachers' day. only saw some familiar faces but i left primary school only four years ago in 2001, so its not surprising that many didn't come back anymore. *sigh*
everything seem to pass so fast it seems. its already the end of august and i've turned finally sixteen. sweet sixteen. what's so sweet about being sixteen anyway? you have to make a choice on where you are going to go after finishing your secondary school education and it may well affect your future, everybody expects you to act like an adult now and the various responsibilities that you have to take up unwillingly. talking about responsibilities, my brother will be leaving for national service soon and i will have to take up the role of looking after and probably guiding my younegr brother and sister then. i will miss my big brother. he's always the one that is the most caring and probably wise? =X ....haha.... my big brother has never taught me my schoolwork no matter how much i asked him to. he has always left me to my own devices when doing my schoolwork. i should probably thank him for that because now, at least i'm able to do my work well and refuse any type of help from any other people unless necessary.
school's been quite okay i think. even though i do slip into depression now and then, i try not to think about it, all the sadness, pain, suffering, and just live my life as it is now. the best way is to put on a brave front for all to see, especially my friends, so that they need not worry about me above all the problems that they might have. i tried that and it kind of worked. only one person knew and that was because i confided in him. hmm... it was really a very bad period for me before and during my mid-year-examninations. i' not sure just how many times i cried during that point of time. i think it started when ms tan was asking why i wasn't doing as well as she expected. i broke down right in front of her when i explained about how i need to take care of my siblings, their attitude towards me and needing to finish my homework at the same time. i did stop the crying in the toilet cubicle but somehow, tears fell again. after that session, i was mainly moody most of the time till after the exams. in my opinion, i was probably depressed because i felt like my friends left me since MZ joined the class and i now sit further away from them. it could also be brought on by the increasing pressure of the upcoming exams at that time because i only felt better after it finished. since then, i've probably tried not to make myself sad or burdened by the ongoings at home or in school so as not to repeat that episode again.
my sixteenth birthday happened to be my most enjoyable with my friends. they did organise an early birthday party for me and EU becasue our birthdays fall on the same month. it was okay..... it didn't really feel like a party to me until the last second when they brought out the birthday cake. on the actual day itself, as usual i don't expect presents from anyone but i stayed happy all the same. in the morning, my malay girlfriends wished me happy birthday and when we were settling at the parade ground, JW came up to me and handed me a present that came from him and BJ. very nice...it turbed out to be chocolate cookies and a chocolate bar. then came the surprise. AF from the next class came with a big package. i was just looking at her and she suddenly handed it to me as a birthday present! what a shock i got! everybody was looking at me and mrs loke wished me happy birthday then and not NHT who sits just two seats behind me. thanks for the blue baby sylvester bolster guys! now i know why you asked for my favourite looney toon character and colour.... by the end of the day, my classmates celebrated my birthday after we were halfway through our class teachers' day project. they made a toast to me and we played with water till about nearly eight at night at the school basketball court. haha.... we were actually locked up but the uncle opened the gates after saying that he would report us to the principal about it. that was a really enjoyable day for me. i would never forget it i guess.... this year sure holds that much memories that are dear to me.... *sigh* its going to be hard leaving the school then...
everything seem to pass so fast it seems. its already the end of august and i've turned finally sixteen. sweet sixteen. what's so sweet about being sixteen anyway? you have to make a choice on where you are going to go after finishing your secondary school education and it may well affect your future, everybody expects you to act like an adult now and the various responsibilities that you have to take up unwillingly. talking about responsibilities, my brother will be leaving for national service soon and i will have to take up the role of looking after and probably guiding my younegr brother and sister then. i will miss my big brother. he's always the one that is the most caring and probably wise? =X ....haha.... my big brother has never taught me my schoolwork no matter how much i asked him to. he has always left me to my own devices when doing my schoolwork. i should probably thank him for that because now, at least i'm able to do my work well and refuse any type of help from any other people unless necessary.
school's been quite okay i think. even though i do slip into depression now and then, i try not to think about it, all the sadness, pain, suffering, and just live my life as it is now. the best way is to put on a brave front for all to see, especially my friends, so that they need not worry about me above all the problems that they might have. i tried that and it kind of worked. only one person knew and that was because i confided in him. hmm... it was really a very bad period for me before and during my mid-year-examninations. i' not sure just how many times i cried during that point of time. i think it started when ms tan was asking why i wasn't doing as well as she expected. i broke down right in front of her when i explained about how i need to take care of my siblings, their attitude towards me and needing to finish my homework at the same time. i did stop the crying in the toilet cubicle but somehow, tears fell again. after that session, i was mainly moody most of the time till after the exams. in my opinion, i was probably depressed because i felt like my friends left me since MZ joined the class and i now sit further away from them. it could also be brought on by the increasing pressure of the upcoming exams at that time because i only felt better after it finished. since then, i've probably tried not to make myself sad or burdened by the ongoings at home or in school so as not to repeat that episode again.
my sixteenth birthday happened to be my most enjoyable with my friends. they did organise an early birthday party for me and EU becasue our birthdays fall on the same month. it was okay..... it didn't really feel like a party to me until the last second when they brought out the birthday cake. on the actual day itself, as usual i don't expect presents from anyone but i stayed happy all the same. in the morning, my malay girlfriends wished me happy birthday and when we were settling at the parade ground, JW came up to me and handed me a present that came from him and BJ. very nice...it turbed out to be chocolate cookies and a chocolate bar. then came the surprise. AF from the next class came with a big package. i was just looking at her and she suddenly handed it to me as a birthday present! what a shock i got! everybody was looking at me and mrs loke wished me happy birthday then and not NHT who sits just two seats behind me. thanks for the blue baby sylvester bolster guys! now i know why you asked for my favourite looney toon character and colour.... by the end of the day, my classmates celebrated my birthday after we were halfway through our class teachers' day project. they made a toast to me and we played with water till about nearly eight at night at the school basketball court. haha.... we were actually locked up but the uncle opened the gates after saying that he would report us to the principal about it. that was a really enjoyable day for me. i would never forget it i guess.... this year sure holds that much memories that are dear to me.... *sigh* its going to be hard leaving the school then...
DiSc0veReD bY KittyCat @ 5:00 PM
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